25 Reasons You Might Need to Wear a Welding Helmet
It turns out that there is more than just one reason you may need a welding helmet. This list of twenty-five will open your eyes to the vast possibilities available with a welding helmet.
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A Dog's Guide To... Getting Your Dog to Stop Barking
The best person to teach you about dog training is, well, a dog. In this article a seasoned barker gives you his tips on getting your dog to stop.
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Funny Things We Dream
I ask you, being a natural marvel, capable of great intellect, doesn't the
human brain have better things to think about? The mechanics of
slumbering grey matter perplex me.
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The Restaurant Chronicles, Part 1
I, as a former member of the exclusive club known as the Restaurant Industry, am about to attempt a categorization of several different types of patrons. This will be the first installment of a series I like to call, The Restaurant Chronicles. In this, Part 1, I will begin a labeling process which will hopefully serve as both comic relief for others in our distinguished field, and also to illuminate those who may unknowingly belong to one (or more) of the following groups.
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Your Stars Part 3
An alternative view of your monthly horoscope as seen by Alex Barker. Alex Barker is not only an astrologer, but also a medium, tarot card reader, rune expert and karaoke enthusiast. He is shortly embarking on a tour of working men's clubs in the Midlands performing his one man show which features him bringing comfort to recently bereaved audience members by putting them in touch with their dearly departed, interspersed with unique renditions of songs by his favourite artists such as Dusty Springfield, Christina Aguilera and Brian McFadden.
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Discover the Lighter Side of the Internet
The other side of the Internet is light and fluffy. It can definitely turn a dark, gray cloud to white.
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Essential Laughter
Take time to laugh at yourself and the ridiculous in life. It is so refreshing to just laugh at your slips, peculiarities, forgetfulness, and fumbles.
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Humor Under The Keyboards
For me, the piano is the symbol of what is stiff, proper and elegant. It doesn't have faults, it is perfect. Pianists are the most perfectionist people in the world. They should not and can not make ...
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Marines Don't Take Crap
Let me tell you about a career choice I was never embarrassed to tell girls about, the Marines. Make no mistake. The Marines are a business. We manufacture the world's finest fighting force, and distribute them worldwide to sell Democracy. If we have to, we'll kick their you know what, provide toilet paper to wipe their butts, and not even take their names because we wouldn't even know how to pronounce them.
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The Joke's On You -- Who Should be the Butt of Your Jokes?
Who should be the butt of your jokes? A question that every children's entertainer (and teacher, and parent, and daycare worker) needs to answer.
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And the World Goes 'Round
If you are a citizen of UK or Australia, you are permitted to snicker at this problem. Anchorage, Alaska, just opened its first two roundabouts at a major intersection.
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Computers According to Carol
Humorous definitions of computer terms, to be used at your own risk.
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He Had It Coming, Your Honor
The joy that is a thyroid biopsy, or "Evil Doctors With Big Needles and the Women That Love Them".
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Space, and the Room for It
Space exploration came a long way since I was the size of a measurable amount of it.
I remember with some pain, my first ride on a penny farthing with its big wheel and long spokes that were well engineered to cut a foot or two off anyone's legs.
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The Language of Appalachia
Appalachians have a language all our own. Linguists have studied it and can tell you where it came from. We can tell you where it came from, too.
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Bed Bugs Bite
I've been thinking for at least 32 seconds about the history of bed bugs and why they are among the most feared creatures in the world, and possibly in the universe, assuming that other worlds have beds. Think about it. We don't tell people, "Don't let the rabid dogs bite" or "Don't let the spiders bite" unless we're in the White House, in which case all warnings are figurative anyway. Everywhere else the line a person hears before sleeping is "Don't let the bed bugs bite," as if bed bugs are worse than the nightmare the person will likely have anyway...
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Can't Get There From Here
Can you imagine living in a state where you cannot drive to the State Capital? But nobody really cares? Then they propose a road to the Capital and nobody really wants it!
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Do Americans Really Understand Irony?
It has been said that Americans simply do not understand the concept of Irony? Given the number of comedies Americans watch on TV and at the movies, it would seem almost impossible that a whole nation could miss such a fundamental comedic technique. So is it possible?
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Eye Spy Potatoes
Lately I've had the problem of falling asleep with my contact lenses still in my eyes. And by "lately," I mean for the past seven years. This, in a lot of ways, is the pinnacle of laziness because the removal of contacts takes no more than a minute or two, or three hours if it's your first time.
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Fried Green Tomatoes Recipe
Then I got to thinking about that human bone she found in her backyard, the bone I was telling you about a couple of weeks ago. Well, I got to thinking maybe they'd cooked up some secret recipe all right. Secret meat that used to be on that bone she found. You know it happened in that movie, Fried Green Tomatoes. They killed that man, chopped him up, made barbeque out of him, and fed him to that Georgia detective, who told Big George that it was the best barbecue he'd ever eaten, and asked him what his secret was. And Big George smiled and said, Thank you, suh, I'd have to say the secret's in the sauce.
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11 Alternative Garden Games
Tired of the same ol', same ol' when it come to entertaining your garden party guests? Weary of boring badminton and jarts? Croquet not your style? Then you're in the right spot! Here are games sure to make your next party the hit of the gardening social season!
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Dog Poo - And You Thought You Had Problems
An international incident in Germany. Desecration of the US flag. Atrocious behaviour by the 'Dog Turd' Brigade. German Police race to stop the shit from hitting the fan.....
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Finding Lost Children
A couple of days ago I had to go to a dealership to get my car fixed. I am not implying that I don't want my car to have children, because who am I to make that choice? More so, I was sent a letter about a recall on one of the parts (the hazards, actually), meaning that the dealership was obligated to fix my car while I watched television and drank free coffee from a vending machine...
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If, An Online Marketer's Internet Addiction Poem, Can You Relate to This?
Do you spend more time behind the computer, than in your car, talking to your wife, or husband or playing with your kids.
When you are running a business online, time runs away from you before you even realize. This is humorous poem from one online internet marketer's expierience.
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The Army Corp of Engineers Having Issues Fixing Breach
The Army Corp of engineers is having a tough time filling in the breaches in the levees. They have tried to use giant sand bags to drop into the hole.
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